Naturally, it is easy for people to love you for the sake of something.
Let’s face it, a good number of people must always find a reason to love.
A young man who looks at a pretty young girl may fall in love with her because of her beauty.
Marriage refers to the coming together of two opposite sex adults to live together as husband and wife after fulfilling all the required rites.
For there to be a legal marriage fundamentally, the bride price must be paid to the family of the lady. This, traditions, law and bible stipulate and recommend it.
Therefore, this implies that when a man puts a woman in his house without accomplishing the necessary cultural and legal requirements regarding the marriage, then both of them cannot be said to be genuinely married yet.
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So listen to me, as a man, you are not married until you carry out those rites which include payment of bride price and every other thing that the family of the woman may need you to do which is within the law and maybe your religious belief.
Why are we taking time to lay emphasis on how to build successful home via a good marriage? It’s that important because war and peace begin at home. A peaceful and lovely home spreads the values to the community, from there to the county to the states and to the nation then all over the world.
This is just by the way, as I will write full article soon on what makes your marriage legitimate or not.
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Back to the main topic which talks about marriage bringing some freedom and taking some away, it is crucial to say that FREEDOM is a state of being free.
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Before marriage as a young man I was so excited that one day I will be free from certain things by the time I got married.
For example, I go to work and return come back home, living alone in my a mini-flat apartment, most times I return with a lot of work related issues I wished I could share with someone close, but when I look around me, there is no one to share them with.
Remember the bible says in Gen. 2 verse 18 “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him“.
So I pray for a wife and hope that by the time I get married, I will surely be having someone I can share my worries with from time to time.
Very correct after, I got married I started having someone I discussed my challenges, dreams, visions, plans and even emotions with. I got that freedom I was questing for at that level.
Also, as a young career bachelor, you leave the house early in the morning and return in the evening as tired as you are, you then enter the kitchen to prepare dinner for yourself.
This is always tiresome to do all the time. And taking dinner in eateries or public spots regularly is not wise economically and in terms of comfort as well as satisfaction.
Hence, I prayed to get married so I can have someone who can assist me to prepare meals for me while I am out, and help to keep the home as well. This part of the freedom as well, I got after getting married.
I prayed to get married soon so I could have someone support me financially as the bible says in the book of Genesis, “I will make for thee a help meet’, someone that will help and support me.
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So that if before getting married, I raised funds for my house rent , family bills, property project all alone, at least my wife can raise me some support no matter how small, it will go a long way to serve in one way or the other.
Indeed, after we got married, I started having such support after some time when she got a small business to do while waiting for a job.
I can also not forget that, the bible says two will warm up each other during a cold night. I prayed to have such opportunity when I got married. Of course, I started enjoying that after my marriage.
I can go on and on, but the bottom line is that I got those freedoms I itched for before marriage.
Most importantly, as marriage gives you freedom in some areas, it takes away freedom in another areas of your life.
Freedom that Marriage took away from us as a couple
The bible says “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord”.
Prov 18:22(King James)
Online dictionary defines wedding as “the act or ceremony of marrying; marriage; nuptials.”
It means joining together a man and woman for the purpose of marriage also known as tying of nuptial knot.
Wedding ceremonies are in different varieties according to cultural and social norms.
In Africa for example almost every community has its own different wedding norms, values and rites.
Wedding day is a day many pray to see yet majority fail to see it till the end of their lives because not all men or women are privileged to get married in their lifetime for certain obvious reasons. This is a topic for another day’s discussion.
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I remember while planning my wedding years ago, as I was under pressure to assemble cash for the project, my wife-to-be then was more relaxed than I was because in my country, it is officially the man’s place to marry a woman and provide everything needed for the ceremony.
Although many women offer some assistance, but this is often out of personal volition and not mandatory.
Women seem to wish to see that day more than men from my observations and the general believe in Africa as they refer to the days as the woman’s day.
Usually, gathering the funds needed to execute wedding programme is most times a huge challenge especially for struggling young people of low income status with less family support.
From the caption of this article, one will tell that managing cost is critical in our discussion of how to make a great wedding.
There are facts you must realized when planning your wedding to guide you in ensuring you have a wedding that is okay and within your budget.
Wedding ceremony is quite a brief exercise compared to the marriage itself. After the wedding, the marriage starts which is the main thing to look out for.
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Yes, nobody hates having nice comments about his/her wedding events like ”oh it was a great wedding”, “did you see that wedding gown? It was beautiful and expensive”, “how about the cars? they were powerful” the cake, the meal, the decorations and the hall itself and so on.
But dear, all those things end there, then the reality of living together and facing the new family challenges stares quickly few minutes or hours after.
There is no need taking huge loans to carry out wedding event. You do not need to sell valuable property to do your wedding.
Plan your budget realistically and implement it religiously based on the size of your income.
All those people coming to put you under pressure to go borrow will leave the scene immediately the event comes to an end, only you and your spouse will be left to face the debtors who come to recover their borrowed funds.
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If you do not want to end up being miserable during the first few days or months of the matrimony, think wisely before you go borrowing.
There basically some things you can do by yourself, your spouse can as well or even your siblings can assist with, do not high consultants to handle them in order to save cost.
For instance, if your wife to be knows how to prepare wedding cake, let her draw up a cost conscious budget to handle that bearing in mind that the funds are in shortfall.
Try to cut cost while keeping in view the need for fair standard of whatever you are to achieve.
It is not necessary to go for expensive items when low cost items good enough can serve the same purpose.
these months by approximately between 10 to 21 percent in most western countries and some parts of Africa.
There are a lot of questions in marriage particularly about age.
Why is this? Why is that?, when will this? When will that? What is this, what is that? And one of the most common question asked by young people is” what is the right age to get married?”
That is because anything that is a great concept and phenomenon must require a lot of knowledge to pursue hence the need to provide answers to numerous pondering about starting a family via marriage.
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Marriage is a platform where everlasting union between couples is formed and maintained.
But there is a very critical question because how you treat marriage depends on the value you place on it. And you cannot place value on anything except you have enough knowledge about the thing.
Of course this is not peculiar to marriage alone but to everything of great value.